I never used to be so... paranoid, I guess would be the best word for it. I doubt everyone's motives nowadays. I hate myself for it, but I can't help it. When people agree to do something I want to do, one of the thoughts that crosses my mind is that they're not doing it because they want to, they're doing it to placate me. I'm online on MSN a lot. When there's nobody online, I have the fear crawling away inside me that they're out doing something fun without me. And it's fun just because I'm not there.

Eesh. When did I get so paranoid, callous and jaded?