If you're going to fly across the sky, then I want to be your wings.

Since writing up what happened last weekend is a damn slight closer to being productive than I am at current, I shall take that route of action.

Friday evening was all driving down to Devon, and involved a large dosage of The Pillows. [Flyp, you know you're to blame. xD] We reached Devon around 7.30, and went to eat dinner at Rachel's pub. She's my dad's cousin or soemthing. ...I seriously have no clue how I'm related to half the people there.
Saturday morning, we went shopping, so I bought 3 new tops and 2 new CDs. >3 Since breakfast wasn't that good, I got soup. ^_^ Carol and David arrived with my brother from London [in the process, discovering just how bad the signal is in that area. xD;;]
At around 8, we went off to the party, and actually saw my cousins for the first time this weekend. Chu~~. I just love the munchkins. Or Henry because he's only almost 2 and he is teh cute, Richard because most of the time I can have a conversation with him, and William because he's a wacky dancer, yo. The other 3... eh. Take 'em or leave 'em. They have their good points. [Jordan, contrary to your suggestion, no brainwashing was done.] Jasmine [second cousin, Rachel's daughter] had the coolest boots too! All fluffy and white. *grins* The band they had was pretty good, although the singer wasn't the best. ...Liked the first song. Fwahaha. Never say I'm not weird. [Sting - Every Breath You Take, if you were wondering.] My brother voluntarily bought his kid sister alcohol. >3 Unfortunately, it was Reef, which is disgusting. One of the photos has the bottle and a half I didn't drink riiiight at the front. Chloe [another second cousin] likes to dance. ._.;; She made everyone dance apart from her boyfriend. xD Poor guy. He must have got scared. [Many sympathies for Vicky if/when my brother brings her home.]
Big family dinner on Sunday [we're talking about 30 people here >>;] which would have mean so much easier if my cousins weren't such idiots. >>;


Right now... I feel annoyed. Not much, but still slightly irritiated.
I was having a bizarre conversation with Nisha the other day. We [me, her, Jenny, Stacey (being teh cyute together ^^), Heather, Anna, Jordan (for a bit), Catherine and Holly (both ignoring us/in their own worlds mainly)] were in the Pyschology room in our free, and I'd ripped a few pages out of my notebook because Jenny wanted to look at it. Nisha was reading them, and we just started talking about it. She knew more than I thought she did, but I shoulda expected that, and anyway, she's cool. [She did seem surprised at how long it had gone on for. Not that there was anything going on, per se. ...I know what I mean. --;]
'You hate those you love the most.'
...Over the last year, I have gotten angry, despairing, depressed, bitchy... I've wanted to hate. I can't. I'm still stuck needing her as a best friend. Nothing more now.
Over the last few weeks, I've gotten over it more than I had in the year before. Makes you think.
[On an aside, the note makes me laugh. It was written during General Studies, and we were just passing the notebook between us. We didn't do any work.]

Also regarding Nisha in a way, and something I was reading. Realised how easy it was after telling my friends that I liked a girl. Because... nobody out of my group of friends is really seriously homophobic [as in no longer wanting to hang around me], and the group of people I'm getting to know better... *laughs* As Lizzy put it, 'How come I know so many gay people!' Jenny keeps saying things like how one day she's going to bite me and set me up with a girl, and Jordan keeps stroking my feet [><;;; why do I have such ticklish feet?!] and... it's just the way things are. I'm bi. Nothing's changed me. Much.
...I don't think I'll ever tell my parents. Not at this moment. Let me just survive the next year and a half.

Eyaaah, why does this always happen? I plan to go to a meet, and I either can't go, or wind up having to leave early. ;______; Gotta be home by 5 for April 3rd.
However, if we do organise a minimeet for my birthday [xDD And you will love it!] then I have promises I can stay later. >3

Today is an extremely expansive day for you and you will find that all matters, especially those having to do with love and beauty, are extremely favored. You will find yourself being the center of attention just about everywhere you are so make sure your teeth are brushed. Radiate out into the world. You may be feeling so light today that you are likely to levitate off the ground a bit as you walk down the street.
Heh. And I get 'rainy' on my love prediction. Makes me laugh, my horoscope does.
Eh, all I've done today is listen to music, read, do some homework and not eat. Kinda 'eh' day. But... I managed not to concentrate on what was getting me down.

So, happy V-day all. Love you all. Never forget that you're special.
And many apologies to Jordan, since I was not able to attack her with a watergun today, as I had promised. ;___; xD
And happy birthday to Emz too~~! [Wow, never knew you had a Valentine's birthday. Happy 16th. ^^]

[Uwaa~~ Long entry. Scary. ;_;]

(no subject)

...God. I wish I'd never looked at the Wildercon website. I'm not going to be able to go at this rate. And it's my own stupid fault. And I don't care what you say, there's always going to be part of my mind which will tell me things are better without me.
Screw feeling better today. They said they'd text and phone me, and they didn't. Can't blame them.
I'm angry and depressed and ill. Just leave me alone.

If you think this is me simply looking for attention, then just believe me. I'm not.

===

Tomorrow I shall clean my room. Truth. It makes me all the more determined to go out on Wednesday.

Well, I'm all messed up, that's nothing new

( Monkey )